Semi Secret Sophie🌙✨

9/14/2025

Lately, I’ve withdrawn. Not because I don’t want connection, but because it’s hard learning—really learning—that I’m the only one I can count on to consistently be there.

And the hardest part? Me, myself, and I have a complicated relationship.

Some days, I’m the MVP of my own life. I’m unstoppable, radiant, sharp as hell. I’m everything.
But right now? I’m not that. I’m in a slump. I’m working with my doctor on yet another med adjustment, and I’m drained. I miss myself. I miss my peace. I miss feeling like I fit in my own skin.

Work has been a lot. Every day brings more responsibilities. Tasks that multiply after each meeting like some kind of office mitosis. I’m doing my best—really, I am—but some days it feels like I’m treading water while fighting a rip current no one else can see.

And that loneliness hits different when you’ve already asked for help.

I let my core people know I’m struggling. I opened up. I was honest. And that silence that followed? That’s when I knew. It’s me against the world… and honestly, me vs. me too.

There’s been fewer check-ins. Less “how are you holding up?” texts. Less warmth. Less reach. It’s just less.

And I’m trying to accept that. The isolation. The quiet. The disappointment.

But it still hurts.

If I could, I’d fill up my tank and head west without a second thought. Just disappear over the horizon for a while. Let the wind unspool the tension from my shoulders. Let the road reintroduce me to myself.

Because right now, I don’t want to be touched, fixed, or questioned.
I just want space. And peace. And a version of me that feels like home again.

xx,

Soph